


You're still beautiful, baby.

by Cloudy_mind125



Series: Little Space Viktuuri!AU [5]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Caring Victor Nikiforov, Chubby Katsuki Yuuri, Crying Katsuki Yuuri, Cute Katsuki Yuuri, Fluff and Angst, Insecure Katsuki Yuuri, Jealousy, Little Space, M/M, Non-Sexual Age Play, Oblivious Victor Nikiforov, Self-Esteem Issues, Soft Boys, They love each other so much
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-16
Updated: 2020-07-29
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:26:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,469
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23178448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cloudy_mind125/pseuds/Cloudy_mind125
Summary: A whimper rose from Yuuri. "I-I..." his rosy lips quivered, and then he broke into loud sobs as big fat tears slided down his cheeks. "Duh-Daddy..." he hiccupped, covering his face with his pawed sweated hands.Viktor's strict attitude broke in that moment. He left the banana on the counter, next to Yuuri, before hugging his little boy. Yuuri sighed heavily and tucked his head into Viktor's neck."What's wrong, sweetheart?" Viktor oozed, his big hand on the little's head, fingers deep into the soft black hair. "I know that something has been bothering you for a while. Tell me about it so Daddy can help."
Relationships: Christophe Giacometti & Victor Nikiforov, Katsuki Yuuri & Yuri Plisetsky, Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov, Phichit Chulanont & Katsuki Yuuri, Phichit Chulanont/Christophe Giacometti
Series: Little Space Viktuuri!AU [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1625500
Comments: 13
Kudos: 264





	1. 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I'll leave this soft fic here, and I hope you'll like it. 
> 
> Please comment if you find any kind of mistake, remember that english is not my first language.

It wasn’t very often when Yuuri and Viktor got to spend time with their friends. The couple was currently having dinner with Phichit, Chris, Yurio, Georgi and Mila. Viktor had booked them a table in a pretty fancy restaurant, where they served exquisite Italian food.

They’d been drinking wine while they ate, and after there wasn’t any food left on their plates, Mila suggested to order something stronger for them to drink.

Yuuri was starting to feel a bit dizzy due the wine, leaning into Viktor’s side while they wrapped their hands under the table as if they were mere teenagers. Yuuri admired how handsome Viktor looked today, wearing his dark red shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, showing off the venous and powerful arms. His silver hair shone thanks to the lights of the restaurant, making some strands look almost golden.

He was laughing at Yuri’s antics right now, the pretty wrinkles around his eyes that only appeared when the older man smiled widely were now on his face.

Yuuri had to suppress the sudden urge to whine, wanting to have Viktor’s gaze fixed on him. The boy was starting to feel small, but he said nothing. They were in public, and with their friends; there would be time for themselves later.

Everything was going perfectly fine, and then Viktor called one of the waitresses to ask for the account. The young woman that came was tall and slim; long golden hair cascading down her shoulders and pretty brown eyes.

Those eyes were completely fixed on Viktor.

“Have you finished?” she wondered, briefly looking at their table. “Or do you want to order something else?”

The way the pretty lady batted her long eyelashes at Viktor was something that Yuuri definitely didn’t like, at all. And the worst part was that Viktor had that charming smile on his face while he looked at her!

Yuuri gave a squeeze to Viktor’s hand.

“We’ve finished.” Viktor announced. “We would want to pay; could you bring us the account, please?”

“Of course.” The waitress said, and Yuuri didn’t miss the way she _winked_. “I’ll be here in a moment.”

She left, walking in a way that her hips bounced in a seductive manner. Yuuri noticed that not only Viktor, but also Chris and Mila, were following the lady’s movements with their eyes.

“Damnit.” Mila commented, raising the cup to her lips and drinking the last gulp of wine. “Why are all the hot girls straight?”

Chris chuckled next to her, resting his chin on the back of his hand. Yuuri noticed how his green eyes looked slightly shinny due the alcohol. The Swiss’ cheeks were a bit rosy too, and he had that sly grin on his handsome face that only appeared when he got a bit drunk.

“That’s one of the reasons I swing both ways.” He commented. “I get to enjoy the best of both, men and women.” Chris then looked at Viktor. “Isn’t that right, Vitya?”

Viktor only let out a short, breathy laugh while he smirked.

Yuuri was aware that Viktor wasn’t like him. The silver haired man had had multiple partners; male and female. He wasn’t as flirty as Chris, but the fact that he had been kind of a playboy before meeting Yuuri was there.

It wasn’t something they spoke about, because Viktor was incredibly caring and considerate with him, taking things as slow as he needed. They’d even started their Daddy-Little dynamic

a few months ago, which Viktor had been very supportive of.

Apart from Viktor, Phichit was the only one who knew his little side and that aspect of him.

It meant that, for Yuuri –who was currently trying quite hard to suppress his headspace. - hearing implications of Viktor’s past with other people affected him. He didn’t want to say that he was jealous, because it was an ugly word, but it was kind of true.

“Hey Pig.” Yurio’s voice broke Yuuri’s trail of thought. His piercing green eyes were looking at him from the other side of the table. “You’re awfully quiet, what’s wrong?”

Every pair of eyes was now on him. Yuuri felt a pink blush grow in his cheeks, heating his face. Even thought they were known people, it stressed Yuuri to be the center of their attention right now. He was a bit drunk, and was having a mental battle about being or not jealous over something as silly as a comment Chris had said. And he was slipping.

“N-nothing.” He muttered, a nervous laugh let out his lips. “I just dozed out, you know… I drank a bit too much.”

Yuuri saw sideways how a mischievous smile formed on Viktor's face.

"Don't worry about it! You ate a lot so it is kind of compensated." The silver haired man let out a light hearted laugh as he pinched Yuuri's stomach. "My Yuuri looks so soft when he gets that squishy tummy!"

Those words made Yuuri freeze in the spot.

He injured himself pretty badly during ballet practice two months ago, so he hadn't been doing as much as exercise as usual. Yuuri hadn't planned to return to ballet at least in a month, because his knee was still recovering.

The thing was, he had a slow metabolism. That meant that Yuuri tended to gain weight easily. All his life his body had been fluctuating between being slightly overweight and being more fit; depending on how much time he dedicated to physical activities.

Now that said regular and demanding exercise he submitted himself thanks to ballet was over -at least temporally,- Yuuri had gained a noticeable lay of fluff. He had thought that it wasn't that much, that he would recover his physique once he returned to his classes. He had thought Viktor didn't mind.

Yuuri wasn't even paying attention anymore as the pretty waitress returned with their account. He didn't even notice Phichit's worried gaze fixed on him.

~Break~

Their way home had been silent, at least for Yuuri's part. Viktor had been trying to chat with him, happy and talkative like all the times he drank at least a bit. He kept giving meaningful glances at Yuuri, patting his thigh here and there with his big warm hands.

Viktor parked his Volvo on the their parking. The Russian had placed his palm on Yuuri's lower back, not moving it from there while they took the elevator that leaded them to the apartment.

Yuuri was eager to get home, put himself in his comfy pajamas and snuggle Mimi on the big bed and basically be able to shut his thoughts out.

But Viktor seemed to have other plans, because as soon as they were inside the apartment, the older man was on Yuuri, kissing him deeply while he grabbed his sides fiercely. Yuuri could feel the urgency in Viktor's grip, the almost painful pressure of his fingers.

They gave a few steps toward their bedroom, and Viktor pushed him to lay on their huge bed.

The silver haired man was unbuttoning his dress shirt, his hands working so fast. His baby blue eyes looked dark and hungry.

Yuuri would had found this view very arousing in another context, but not right now. The younger felt little, and vulnerable and definitely not in the mood for sex.

Viktor leaned to kiss him again, claiming his plump lips with his own. Yuuri whined, putting a hand on Viktor's now naked chest to gently push him away.

Viktor blinked. "What's wrong, love? Are you okay?"

Yuuri looked down, eyes glued to his lap while he bit his lower lip. The words seemed to escape him, and his usually happy and safe headspace felt _wrong._

"Is my Yuuri feeling little?" Viktor inquired.

Yuuri nodded and suddenly, strong arms were manhandling him and guiding him towards his boyfriend's lap. The black haired boy felt himself relax as he rested his head in Viktor's shoulder, sighing.

Yuuri's eyes wandered around their bedroom, trying to distract himself. He noticed that since he had confessed Viktor about his regression, their home had changed. There were plushies spread around the rooms and some of his drawings were stuck in the fridge. 

He snuggled closer to Viktor. " 'M c-cold, Daddy." he whispered.

Viktor placed a tender kiss to his front. "Then wait here while Daddy looks for fluffy socks." Yuuri nodded eagerly, sliding out of Viktor's lap so he could get up.

Yuuri observed how Viktor -with the red shirt unbuttoned, leaving his powerful chest and torso in sight.- padded towards the drawers were they kept his little items.

Viktor returned seconds later with a pair of blue fluffy socks with snowflakes, Yuuri's favorite pair. As the Russian kneeled in front of him to put the socks on, Yuuri noticed a bulge on Viktor's pants.

He kissed Yuuri's feet lovingly before raising his gaze to look at the boy in the eyes. "Do you feel better now, baby?" His face morphed when he saw where Yuuri's eyes fixed on. He quickly glanced at his bulge and then he sighed. "Don't worry about this, it will come down eventually. "

"Mhmm..." Yuuri felt a bit guilty, like he was neglecting Viktor's needs with his own, but he really wasn't in the mood.

He felt his boyfriend's fingers down his chin, applying a bit of force that made him look up at him. Viktor had this kind, gentle expression on his face that only made him feel _guiltier, greedy._

"Are you in the mood for a bath, little one?" Viktor asked. "We can do it together, if you like. This way we'll be all relaxed before going to sleep."

Yuuri silently nodded.

After a few minutes, they found themselves in their bathroom, inside of the full bathtub. Viktor had handed him a bath bomb that made the water around them look sparkly pink, making Yuuri's little mind slip a bit further.

He'd had a not so great day. His anxious thoughts had been plaguing his mind during all the dinner, torturing him with mean comments. They were about him, his looks, his weight, how Viktor had been with people better than him, how he was not satisfying his boyfriend...

Now, leaning against Viktor warm body while he massaged his head as he washed his hair was relaxing him a bit. It was comfortable, safe. It was just what he needed, because Viktor always gave him whatever Yuuri needed. He was that perfect.

Yuuri could had fallen asleep right there, body limp against a slightly stronger one. He felt how his eyelids were heavier within seconds, but the atmosphere broke as soon as Viktor said:

"You really look soft right now." he commented, and his hands travelled down his body so he could pinch his tummy. "So cuddly and squeezable, like my own human sized plushie."

Yuuri looked at his body, noticing the belly rolls that hadn't been there months ago. He felt his cheeks get a darker shade of pink due the shame. He whined, and his smaller hand tried to push the bigger one away from his body. 

" 'M sweepy... wan' to go bed, puh-pwease." he whispered, suddenly eager to be dressed and to have his body covered.

If Viktor was surprised, he didn't show it. The Russian just kissed the side of his head. "Of course baby, whatever you want." he then kissed Yuuri's chubby cheek. "My sweet boy."

Despite Yuuri's request, they didn't rush out of the bathtub. Viktor peppered his face with kisses while he gently caressed the little's body. After a while, the couple got out of the water and dressed in bathrobes; Yuuri with his bear towel and wearing the fluffy socks. 

He was currently clinging on Viktor, his head under the taller man's chin as he sank his face in Viktor's neck, sniffing his comforting scent.

"Baby, we have to get you dressed." Viktor mumbled, weakly shaking his shoulders. Yuuri only snuggled closer as an answer, making the older one to sigh. "You little needy

thing..."

And that was the only thing he said before grabbing Yuuri by his legs and carry him bridal style to their bedroom. The younger one tried somehow to make himself smaller, lighter. He knew Viktor was in peak physical shape, but he couldn't help but to feel embarrassed and even more worried about his boyfriend getting hurt.

It would had been easier if Yuuri was ski- No. He had to stop thinking this way, he was with Daddy and everything was fine.

Viktor gently put him on the bed, and he gave a reassuring rub to his tummy before removing his fluffy bear towel. Yuuri felt the warmth spreading on his cheeks and he whined, closing his eyes and turning his head to avoid Viktor's face.

He felt Viktor's hands on his prince parts while he spread the cream and baby powder. The Russian held his legs up to put under his bum the diaper, which Yuuri could hear cringle under him.

"Baby, open your eyes please." the oozing voice that came from his Daddy's lips made Yuuri's heart melt. He opened one of his eyes, and he saw Viktor holding what looked like a shirt. "I have to put you this, could you please sit up a little?"

Yuuri did as he was told. Once the shirt passed over his head, the Japanese boy discovered that it was really a onesie. Before Viktor finished buttoning the flaps, he could peek at his diaper with cute animals printed on it. The onesie was baby blue, with some clouds on it and even pretty rainbows here and there. 

It was tight against his body and the diaper poked out of the onesie's leg holes, making it very noticeable. Yuuri usually liked to wear legless onesies that let him see his bare thighs and smooth legs. He felt specially little when he wore them, and the boy experienced a lot more sensations when his sensitive legs were bared. Like that, he could feel the playmat, his fuzzy blankies and even the not so soft material of his Daddy's trousers.

But right now, he just felt... too exposed. He would had actually preferred a footie onesie that covered all his body from everyone's eyes, even his own.

"Here! All dressed an ready now! Does it feel right, sweetie?" Viktor cooed. "Is it too tight?"

Yuuri felt like he was going to cry right there. Was it that obvious that he gained weight that his onesies didn't fit him? He shook his head, unable to pronounce a single word.

Viktor was looking at him for a few seconds, before his pretty blue eyes opened like plates and gasped. "I forgot something important!" he announced, opening a drawer next to Yuuri's head and pulled out a pacifier clip.

He secured one end to his onesie and the other to a pastel blue pacifier Viktor had also taken. The rubber nipple was pushed into his mouth and Yuuri gave a small suck.

Suckling on his paci made Yuuri's body abandon the resistance, letting him relax. 

"That's right, _now_ you're completely dressed and ready for sleep." Viktor traced the line of his cheekbones with his thumb. "You're adorable, baby."

Yuuri would had wanted to reply something, but his mind was blanking and his whole body felt _so_ heavy with sleep. The little blinked slowly a few more times before closing his eyes for good.

~Break~

It had been a week since Viktor and Yuuri went out to the restaurant, and the CEO was completely sure that something was wrong with Yuuri. He wondered if it had something to do with his knee injury, or his stressful situation with his exams... The fact was that the black haired boy acted weird, and Viktor didn't know what it was.

He noticed Yuuri had stopped wearing his cute clothes at home, changing it for baggy sweatpants and basic white hoodies. It had been almost two weeks without having a single little day, and Viktor was starting to see the effects it had on Yuuri. The Japanese boy had been having short temper, and he looked on edge most of the times they spoke.

And also, there was the thing that Yuuri seemed to never be hungry. He always had an excuse: 'I had a good breakfast'; 'I ate lunch too late'; 'I'm not feeling well...' and so on.

Viktor was starting to get a bit worried. This morning Yuuri had said goodbye to Viktor while he was packing his snack along his books and material for college. The CEO had received some texts from the boy during the day, and the most recent ones were full of grammatical mistakes and not a single full sentence. That meant one thing, Yuuri had finally slipped into Little Space.

Viktor tried to get home as soon as he could, which wasn't until two hours after receiving the messages. So when he opened the front door, he was instantly welcomed by a brown fur that jumped on him. Viktor could barely put his bag down while he petted Makkachind and scratched behind the poodle's ears before Yuuri popped out from the kitchen. He gave a high pitched scream of ' _Daddy!!!'_ while he ran towards him, wearing red pajama shorts and an oversized blue sweater that made his small fingers poke out at the end of the long sleeves.

Viktor opened his arms to welcome his sweet boy, who launched himself into the older male's embrace, his arms wrapped around Viktor's neck.

The Russian held Yuuri tightly, pressing an exaggerated loud kiss to his head. Yuuri giggled at that.

"How's my baby doing?" Viktor asked, mouth pressed now into Yuuri's chubby cheek, kissing him there as well. "Did you have a good day? Were you a good boy while I wasn't home?"

The little leaned back so the two males were now looking at each other's faces. Yuuri nodded quickly at the question directed to him, gummy smile on his round precious face. Viktor patted his bottom playfully, grabbing the plush flesh of his darling's butt, making Yuuri whine softly.

"Baby, I know you missed me, but could you please let me go for a moment?" Viktor asked. "I would want to go to the kitchen, so I can drink and start preparing dinner."

Yuuri pouted, but he complied nevertheless. He let go Viktor's body, and then he pulled down the sweater's long sleeves, swallowing his tiny hands. The little proceed to follow Viktor like a puppy while he padded to the kitchen.

When they got to the kitchen, Yuuri made grabby hands at Viktor and pointed to the counter. The Russian sighed, lifting the dark haired boy and placing him there. Yuuri was swinging his legs in little kicks as Viktor searched for some food and pans to cook.

When Viktor turned to grab the oil from one of the drawers and saw a banana left on the counter with the tiniest bite on its end, he looked back at Yuuri with an eyebrow risen. This morning Yuuri had packed the last banana they had as a snack for between his lectures.

"Care to explain what is this?" he said, picking up the fruit and holding it up to Yuuri's face, who was playing with the hem of his sweater.

The little raised his head when he heard Viktor's serious voice. As soon as he recognized what the older one had in his hand, he sucked his bottom lip into his mouth.

"A 'nana..." he said, and the chocolate irises avoided to meet Viktor's face.

He snorted. "Very clever, little man. I know it, but what is it doing here instead of inside your tummy, huh?" The CEO tilted his face, trying and failing to look at Yuuri's eyes. "This was supposed to be your snack for between classes. Why didn't you eat it?"

Yuuri whimpered, eyes glued to the floor as he slipped his stubby fingers between his rosy plump lips. " 'Cause it's icky." he replied.

Viktor raised his eyebrows, because that was a blatant lie spoken to his face. Yuuri loved bananas, they were his favorite fruit and he adored to eat them as a snack, especially when little.

Viktor left the banana where he had found it, and he walked towards Yuuri, standing now between his parted legs. Then he pulled the boy's fingers out of his pouty lips, not knowing when it had been the last time the little washed his hands.

"Look at me, little one." Viktor demanded, and Yuuri raised his huge puppy eyes. "What have you eaten today?"

Yuuri frowned, looking nervous and clearly not liking the path this conversation had taken. The little swayed his body a bit, and his lack of response was enough answer for Viktor.

He recovered the banana and then pressed its end to Yuuri's bottom lip. "Eat, and you better be a good boy and obey Daddy in this."

The Japanese boy gave the tiniest bite to the fruit, sadness painted in his face. When Viktor tried to make him take another bite, Yuuri turned his head, letting out a slightly distressed sound.

"Yuuri." Viktor warned, and the fact that he was now using his real name instead of a petname made the younger look at him with a stubborn expression. "Drop that attitude, or I'll punish you." Viktor pinched his eyebrows together. "You know that skipping meals breaks one of the most important rules, don't you?"

Yuuri reluctantly parted his petal lips in order to let Viktor feed him. The CEO forced him to take a bigger bite this time, and Yuuri looked at him angrily while he slowly chewed. The little then stopped moving his jaw, and he maintained his cheeks puffed like a squirrel's.

"Swallow it." Viktor ordered. "Don't test me, Yuuri. Not with something like this." he made the adamant to give the boy another bite, but the dark haired male shook his head. " _Yuuri,_ you know that Daddy could send you to bed right after dinner? That means no Disney movie and bedtime story.

A whimper rose from Yuuri. "I-I..." his rosy lips quivered, and then he broke into loud sobs as big fat tears slided down his cheeks. "Duh-Daddy..." he hiccupped, covering his face with his pawed sweated hands.

Viktor's strict attitude broke in that moment. He left the banana on the counter, next to Yuuri, before hugging his little boy. Yuuri sighed heavily and tucked his head into Viktor's neck.

"What's wrong, sweetheart?" Viktor oozed, his big hand on the little's head, fingers deep into the soft black hair. "I know that something has been bothering you for a while. Tell me about it so Daddy can help."

Yuuri sniffled, face still hidden as he cried his eyes out in Viktor's chest. The CEO hated to see his darling that way, and he felt frustrated with himself, not knowing what happened or what to do.

"Let's talk about this somewhere more comfortable." Viktor said, and then he carried to boy to the living room.

It didn't go unnoticed the way Yuuri's body seemed to tense as the strings of a violin when he lifted him. Viktor felt how his boyfriend grabbed the front of his shirt in his petite fists.

" I cuh-can walk..." Yuuri whispered, voice muffled because he had Viktor's chest pressed just against his lips. "W-will huwt you." he added, as Viktor laid him down on the sofa.

Viktor was honestly surprised by this. Yuuri adored being carried around when he was little, he had told him that multiple times. What was this resistance now?

"Nonsense! I can carry you just fine!" He replied, trying to make his voice sound as cheerful as he could.

Yuuri seemed to have calmed down, but suddenly his cries returned with their full force. Viktor wrapped his arms around him, trying to sooth him the best he could. This was something new for him. Yuuri had never been this distressed while little, and Viktor didn't know what had even caused it in the first place.

Yuuri was leaning into his arms while he sobbed inconsolably. "'M sowwy!"

"Shh, don't apologize, little one. Just talk to me." Viktor tried to pull his boyfriend into his lap, but surprisingly, Yuuri pushed away. He mumbled something, barely intelligible words. However, the Russian was sure he understood the words 'too heavy'.

Viktor stopped his attempts to put the boy over his lap, and instead he stared wide eyed at him.

"Baby, _please_ tell Daddy what's wrong." he pleaded, brushing some black curls away from Yuuri's forehead.

The boy's body was currently being racked by sobs, while tears fell down his pink chubby cheeks.

"Duh-Daddy I-I..." Yuuri had to stop in order to take a very shaky breath. "'M sowwy 'm ugly."

It was in that very moment when everything seemed to click into place. Yuuri had been wearing baggy clothes that had nothing to do with his usual cute outfits. The younger one's resistance to eat, and the way he seemed to shy away from Viktor's touch sometimes.

It still hurt. He always tried to tell Yuuri how much he loved him, how achingly cute and pretty he found him. Knowing that his baby had been thinking that way was a low blow for Viktor as well, both as a caregiver and boyfriend.

He kissed Yuuri's eyelids softly, wiping away the tears with his thumbs. "Why would you think that, sweetie?" he cuddled into the younger.

"Buh-because I-I fat now! A-and I guh-got chubs on my tummy-" Yuuri sniffled, and Viktor put his hand on his chest, just over his heart. He wanted to make Yuuri concentrate in something else. "D-dunno, 'm sowwy..."

"Yuuri, baby I don't think you're fat. And even if you've gained some weight, it doesn't make you less beautiful." He kissed Yuuri's button nose. "I love your tummy, _detka_. And I find your round cheekies so cute." to prove that, he pinched the soft flesh, making Yuuri whine.

It wasn't after long minutes of soft sniffles and tight hugs when Viktor spoke again.

"From now on, I'm making sure you eat." He announced, looking at a still sad and pouty Yuuri.

~Break.~

The next morning, Yuuri awoke feeling big. He found himself curled in Viktor's strong arms, that held him so very close to his body.

They had breakfast silently. Since it was Sunday, none of them had to leave the house, so they were still dressed with their sleeping clothes.

Viktor was watching intensely Yuuri's every moment while he ate. He felt uncomfortable, bringing food to his mouth even when he was convinced that every bite would only make him chubbier and more undesirable.

On the other hand, he wanted to be good for Viktor, and the other man wanted him to eat.

It wasn't Yuuri finished his toast and his coffee when Viktor spoke.

"Yuuri, I wanted to talk about what happened yesterday." he said, fixing his hypnotizing eyes on him. "You left me clear what it was about, but I wanted to actually hear a proper explanation."

The black haired male chewed his bottom lip. He hadn't wanted to explode the way he did yesterday. His initial plan had been to recover his previous physical form and trying to decrease the time he spent in Little Space.

It obviously didn't go the way he planned.

"I-I guess I was just insecure, you know..." he breathed in, trying to order all the ideas inside his head. "You are the first person I date, and that makes me the inexperienced one. I was scared that I couldn't satisfy you, or that my little headspace made you act and do things you don't actually enjoy." Yuuri was rambling now, his words leaving his mouth with almost no control. "It hit me back on the restaurant, when you were commenting about that pretty waitress, that maybe I wasn't enough or what you liked."

Viktor's baby blue eyes were very open. The Russian had an expression of incredulity printed on his handsome face, lips partly opened as he listened to Yuuri.

"And then I noticed how much weight I've actually gained. B-but you lift me like I'm a feather, but I'm not. I'm not actually _small_ , and you will hurt yourself carrying me..." he let out a shaky breath. "I just felt undesirable, and not little enough."

Viktor almost didn't let him finish before he was getting up and went towards Yuuri. He cupped his face with his hands and pressed his lips over the boy's plump ones. This time it wasn't a deep filthy kiss, not even a innocent one. It was slow and loving, meant to comfort.

"You're so pretty, Yuuri." he whispered, so close that they inhaled each other's breath. "You don't see it, and I wish you could." His kind blue eyes searched for his gaze. "Does it have to do with something I've done or said, love?"

'No' it was what Yuuri would had wanted to say. But the truth was that Viktor _did_ something, even if it wasn't ill-hearted.

"You keep making comments about me being soft, and how squishy my tummy is..." Yuuri explained, feeling a bit better now that he was saying all of this out loud. " And they kind of made me feel self conscious about my figure. I know you didn't mean anything bad, but it still hurt."

Viktor gave an understanding humming, face very serious as he absorbed every word the black haired boy said.

"I understand." he said, after a few seconds of silence. "I understand and I'm sorry, sweetheart. You are more than enough and your headspace has never been or will be a problem. I like to take care of you, and I really feel like the shittiest boyfriend ever." he whispered the last part. "I've never wanted to make you feel insecure, Yuuri."

The shorter male got on his tiptoes to press his lips on Viktor front, letting his lips caress the skin for some seconds before parting.

"I know." He smiled, the corner of his mouth softly raised.

The mood suddenly changed as Viktor's face morphed from the serious mask from a cheerful one in mere seconds. "Then let me compensate you, let's go out! What would you like to do, baby?"

Yuuri could only giggle.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I just..." he mumbled and for once he looked as young as he was, if not more. "I don't like the idea of you feeling bad because of us and not saying anything, it makes me feel shitty."  
> And Yuuri couldn't help the giggle that left his lips in that moment, feeling warm in his chest as he did so. Yurio could act all though and rude, but he really was a very good kid with such a gentle heart. The Japanese man had never felt bad about anything the blonde said to him –not after getting to know him well– but hearing this kind of apology from his part was quite nice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! If I'm being honest, writing this wasn't part of my plans, but some people in the comments made me realize how there were some topics I could add in this story. I wrote the continuation the best I could, so I hope you'll like it!
> 
> Please tell me on the comments if you find any kind of mistake or if I should change something. Thank you for reading!

Things after his 'confrontation' –if anyone could call it that way– with Viktor, were doing almost normal; as if nothing had happened.

Well, there was the fact that the silver haired man was observant of Yuuri's eating habits. Viktor tried to be discreet, that was obvious, but the Russian was failing at it miserably. Every time he brought up the food topic, there was this shadow that crossed his baby blue eyes, telling Yuuri that the other was in fact upset.

 _"Did you like the meal?"_ And a too cheery smile would appear on his angled face. _"We should order dessert, those cheese cakes look delicious!"_

And don't get him wrong because Yuuri absolutely adored how supportive his boyfriend was, how often he made sure to tell him how attractive he found him; extra weight or not. It was just... Yuuri couldn't help but think Viktor was somehow biased? His problem with food was a long term one, and even if Yuuri managed to get over it for a while, it always kind of returned to him.

And it wasn't just Viktor. Now Phichit also gave him those worried eyes every time he saw Yuuri eyeing his plate for a little longer than what was considered normal. Unlike Viktor, the Thai knew the full extent of his bad relationship with food; aware of how _deep_ it was.

Yuuri couldn't help it, but he felt kind of ashamed every time Phichit checked out for him. He didn't want to worry his best friend, making him think that it was somehow his duty to look out for Yuuri's well being.

That was why spending time with Yurio felt that nice. It was like taking a break. The blonde teen didn't fuss like his friend and boyfriend did, and his grumpy yet cheeky behavior was a great change to have once in a while.

"How long is it gonna be until you can return to ballet?" Yurio asked, not raising his eyes from his phone screen; typing something while doing so.

They were both in Viktor and Yuuri's flat, sitting on the couch with Netflix on and watching some show the teen had recommended. Yuuri found curious the fact that Yurio wasn't even looking at the screen in any moment. He saw how the younger's fingers moved surprisingly fast as he texted someone.

Viktor had once commented that Otabek –Yurio's older best friend.– was maybe something more than that.

And now, seeing the tender look on the blonde teen, it was more than obvious for Yuuri to know what was going on between those two. They would make a fine couple, he thought, they just clicked so well together.

Yuuri shoved the taunting thoughts of how it wasn't the same for him and Viktor, and tried to concentrate in the other male's words.

Ballet. Right.

"I-uh... I don't really know." he confessed, and the questioning look Yurio's green eyes shot him made him feel more than a bit nervous. "The doctor said that a lesion like mine would take a few months to fully recover, so I guess it'll be a while."

Yuri hummed, and the Japanese male thought that he was going to return his attention to his phone, but he didn't. The blonde's piercing gaze was fixed on him when he basically threw his phone somewhere in the sofa.

For a moment, there was just this heavy silence between them. Yuuri squirmed in his seat, the bubbling sensation already running through his veins.

"What?" he finally blurted, because it was getting nearly impossible to bear the sensation of the teen studying him from this close. "A-are you going to say something? Or are you going to just keep looking at me?"

"I'm a bit mad with you, actually." Yuri said, bold as ever. His words, however, took the Japanese Yuuri by surprise, making him blink repeatedly. "I don't understand why you never told me how my way of talking bothered you."

Yuuri was out of words, his mind blank and unable to form a full coherent sentence useful enough to reply the blonde's statement.

"Phichit spoke with me the other day." Yuri continued explaining. "And he told me that we calling you 'piglet' or 'piggy' is something that makes you feel bad."

Yuuri wasn't sure what he wanted to do right now. He was between calling Phichit with his phone and scream at him, or to run towards his bedroom and wrap himself with his fluffy blanket and pretend they weren't having this conversation. His hands itched with the sudden urge to hold Mimi, so Yuuri curled them into fists.

"You know how Phichit is," Yuuri tried to sound casual, but he saw the obvious doubt in Yurio's eyes. "He's always been a bit overprotective of me, but it isn't a big deal."

Viktor's little cousin sighed, and the sound was clearly annoyed. "Could you stop doing that? It's kind of infuriating, you know."

"But I'm not doing anything!"

"Yes! You're always doing it!" Yurio's voice had raised to an octave now. "You're always feigning everything's is fine, and that things don't affect you, like back at the restaurant when the idiot of your boyfriend was looking at the waitress!"

Yuuri hunched a bit at that, hugging his legs and trying to make himself as physically small as possible. He knew Yurio wasn't angry at him, not in a bad way at least, but his tone made him feel a bit anxious. The Japanese boy wished he could slip his thumb into his mouth, because that would help him relax at least a bit.

"Viktor would never cheat on me." Yuuri declared, and the mere sentence made him feel a bit bad. "We talked about this, and I'm okay knowing he's had other lovers before me."

It was the natural thing to do, he thought. Yuuri couldn't torment himself with the knowledge of Viktor having past lovers, because that would be _toxic._ However, there was some truth in Yurio's words, because he had felt hurt when Viktor had blatantly checked out that pretty waitress right in front of him. Sure, people can look, but there had to be some respect for your partner.

What wasn't Viktor's fault was how self-conscious that made him feel; that waitress was everything he wasn't: tall, slim and pretty. Yuuri decided to keep to himself that information, though.

"You know I'm not talking about the old man cheating." the teen said, and it was like he had read Yuuri's thoughts. "But Viktor acted like an asshole that day at the restaurant."

Yuuri wanted to reply something, anything, to defend his boyfriend. However, he just pressed his lips into a tight line, preventing the whimper that was already forming at his throat due to stress.

"And why are you... telling me this?" the black haired male inquired, voice small as he spoke.

Yurio's ears were pink even if his face had a grumpy expression on it. Yuuri knew him enough to know that the blonde teen was just embarrassed and a bit awkward at having to speak about feelings.

"I just..." he mumbled and for once he looked as young as he was, if not more. "I don't like the idea of you feeling bad because of us and not saying anything, it makes me feel shitty."

And Yuuri couldn't help the giggle that left his lips in that moment, feeling warm in his chest as he did so. Yurio could act all rebel and rude, but he really was a very good kid with such a gentle heart. The Japanese man had never felt bad about anything the blonde said to him –not after getting to know him well– but hearing this kind of _apology_ from his part was quite nice.

"That's very sweet of you, Yurio." he said, making the teen practically bark at him while saying to 'not to call him with that dumb nickname'.

Everything went pretty fine after that. They continued watching the show in relative silence, speaking and commenting what was happening once in a while. The Japanese boy was relaxing and silently sliping, although he didn't say anything to the blonde. At half past seven of the afternoon, Yuri declared that he had to go, to which Yuuri only nodded.

It wasn't until the door closed entirely that Yuuri sighed and popped his thumb into his mouth almost automatically. The slow and rhythmic motion helped him relax greatly, even if he wasn't entirely in his headspace. 

He spent the rest of the day on the couch without eating anything for dinner.

~Break~

The happy giggling sounds filled the living room, and made Viktor's lips stretch into a sappy smile.

He was currently screwing the top of Yuuri's sippy cup after filling it with the little's favorite strawberry milk, and headed towards the living room, where his boyfriend was right now.

Yuuri turned his head as soon as he sensed the Russian coming, and greeted him with a gummy smile on his face. His eyes looked like liquid chocolate, with those long and curled eyelashes that brushed his cheeks when he blinked.

"Hehe, Daddy!" he said, making grabby hands at Viktor so he could give him the sippy cup and stuck it into his mouth. Yuuri's eyes closed in delight, and hummed happily as the tasty milk flooded his mouth.

Viktor sat in the sofa next to him, observing how the black haired male drank eagerly, which made him feel quite relieved. It was good to see Yuuri enjoying food these days, and those moments when his boyfriend felt little were the best opportunity he had to feed him properly.

He tried to make sure Yuuri ate, and showered him in praises pretty often, because the Japanese man was weak to that. And if doing it helped in making Yuuri feel happy and got him to stay healthy, Viktor would do it without a doubt.

Yuuri was clumsily trying to reach for Mimi, but let out a whine at not being able to get the plushy from where he sat. He looked back at Viktor with a pout in his face, his rosy lips already quivering.

"Daddy! Mimi, pwease!"

Viktor's smile was soft. "Of course, my prince." he reached over to take the plushy and handed it to Yuuri, who made a happy sound at that. "Do you want something else? A snack? Your paci?"

"Uh uh..." Yuuri nodded, half his face buried in Mimi, muffling his sweet voice. "Want paci..." and then, the unmistakable sound of a growling stomach interrupted him.

"I think a snack would be nice." Viktor commented, voice amused but very serious about the matter. "What do you want, baby? You choose."

Yuuri frowned a bit, still holding Mimi tightly against his chest and looking like deciding his snack was a life changing decision. For a moment, Viktor worried that his boyfriend was going to deny the food, but that got quickly shoved aside when Yuuri peeked his head up and spoke.

"Want chicken nuggets!" he proclaimed. "But the little ones, pwease!"

"The dinosaur shaped ones?" Viktor asked, fully knowing the answer.

As expected, Yuuri's eyes lightened at the mention of his favorite meal, beaming up at him excitedly. "Yes! Yes, Daddy!"

Viktor ruffled his hair, not even a bit bothered by the loud voice his love was using, finding it endearing instead. "Of course, baby. Stay here while I prepare everything, okay?"

Yuuri gave a single yet energetic nod at that. Viktor chuckled to himself, going to the kitchen in order to prepare everything for his boyfriend. The nuggets didn't take too long to cook, and he collocated them in one of Yuuri's plate –with a smiley face that could be visible if the little finished his food– carefully.

As Viktor came back to the living room, he observed his boyfriend's figure sitting right in front of the coffee table, completely oblivious to him. Yuuri looked absolutely adorable, wearing a pastel blue and white striped onesie with a set of shortalls. The outfit made Yuuri look so small and cute, accentuating his boyfriend's bit of roundness in the best of ways, making him seem soft and cuddly.

He remembered the words Yuuri said about himself days ago, talking as if not being pencil thin wasn't good enough, which was bullshit.

"Yuuri, food's ready~!" he announced, catching said one's attention right away. "I bet you were quite hungry, sweetie." Viktor said, putting the plate full of nuggets in the coffee table in front of Yuuri.

The little whined a little embarrassed when his stomach growled again. Instead of instantly tasting the nuggets, Yuuri ducked his head in a shy demeanor and covered it with Mimi. His voice came out muffled when he spoke. "Nu-uh, thank you..."

Viktor frowned, confused and only a little annoyed by Yuuri's sudden change of mood. Everything was going just fine, and the Japanese boy had reacted so well to the food... He wondered what the heck could have gone wrong in Yuuri's mind while he wasn't with him. Sometimes Viktor wished he could understand more from where Yuuri's insecurities came from, instead of just trying to comfort him.

However, the Russian didn't give up, and pushed a bit more. "Baby, I made these for you. It would make me very happy if you ate it..."

Yuuri's cheeks puffed out as he rolled his pink bottom lip into a pout. He glanced down at his full plate, hugging the plushy tighter to his chest, clearly feeling bad. " Okie Daddy... but jus' a little..."

That made Viktor's smile return in its full glory to his face. He observed how Yuuri reached out to his food, still holding Mimi in one of his arms. Viktor stopped him, which made the little look up at him in confusion. "Daddy?"

The expression in Viktor's face was a soft, gentle one. "If you eat with Mimi, you can get him dirty, little prince." he explained, speaking slowly. "It's better if we put him aside for a while."

Yuuri looked a bit reluctant, glancing down at the stuffed toy in his arms with sad eyes.

"Can... can Mimi sit on the couch and watch?" the little asked with a small voice. "I-uh... I don't want him to feel alone..."

And honestly? If Yuuri was going to eat then Viktor would do anything for him. That, along the fact that he was completely at the black haired male's mercy when he made such cute faces.

"That's okay, baby." Viktor agreed, and he gently removed Mimi from the other's embrace. "Mimi can stay on the couch, that way he can see you while you eat and not feel left out."

"Yes, Daddy..." Yuuri whispered, and then he looked at the plushy with doe eyes that made Viktor's heart hurt. " 'm sorry, Mimi."

He felt a bit bad for taking the plushy from Yuuri, but suddenly, and idea popped in his mind. "Don't be sad, little one." he held Mimi right in front of the little's face. "Give him a kiss so Mimi doesn't get upset, okay?"

With Yuuri's cheeks colored in that sweet pink shade, he closed his eyes and puckered his plump lips to kiss the plushy. When the black haired male leaned into the kiss, Viktor was quick to replace the stuffed toy with him, giving Yuuri a short peck on the lips.

That made Yuuri jump in surprise. "Daddy~!" he whined, and the cute tone made Viktor laugh a bit. " 's not fair! The kiss was for Mimi!"

Yuuri sounded genuinely upset, so Viktor let him kiss the plushy this time before putting it on the couch. He collocated Mimi to make it seem like he was looking at Yuuri, a detail that delighted his boyfriend greatly.

As soon as Viktor sat next to him once again, Yuuri tried to reach out for a nugget, but stopped when he saw how the Russian tried to give him the food instead.

"I can do it myself!" he protested.

"I know you want to baby, but you're too little. Let me help, okay?" Viktor said, and his voice sounded like honey, making the little squirm in place. "Little boys can be messy, sweetheart."

"I won't!" Yuuri insisted, but Viktor's face remained the same. "Daddy!"

"Enough arguing, open up." The older one commanded, and Yuuri couldn't do more but to obey.

The silver haired man observed in partial silence how his adorable boyfriend ate, making sure to praise him once in a while. Viktor's words made that pretty blush appear on Yuuri's cheeks, swollen after every mouthful he gave.

Half an hour later, Viktor's smile was wide enough to hurt his face when he saw the plate in front of Yuuri completely empty; the smiley face in full display. The little finished chewing the last mouthful with a satisfied sigh, leaning back and patting his now swollen stomach. "All done Daddy!"

"Yeah, I see that." Viktor agreed, giving him a soft kiss to his front. "Do you want something sweet, little one? We have those chocolate cookies you like so much."

Yuuri's eyes sparkled a bit at that, and Viktor gave himself a mental but very proud pat in the back.

"C-can I has one Daddy?" he asked shyly, and the CEO's heart melted at that.

He got up from the floor instantly. "Of course you can, my darling." and he padded towards the kitchen to grab said cookies.

Maybe he was a bit responsible of Yuuri's added weight, but he couldn't care less about it. It was a fact that he loved to take care of his boyfriend, make him feel loved and special.

That, along being allowed to enjoy Yuuri's little side, made Viktor useful in a way that was comfortingly different from what he was used to at work.

Without people like him or Phichit, Yuuri would probably starve himself to death or push his body to its limits only to continue with those ridiculously high standards he had set for himself.

He came back with the chocolate cookie in his hand, showing it to Yuuri, whose whole face lightened up at the sight. The little practically melted after giving the first bite to the cookie.

"What do we say for that, baby boy?" Viktor arched an eyebrow at him.

"Thank you, Daddy!" Yuuri said, mouth partially full.

Viktor's hand was massaging the little's stomach, whose eyelids trembled like butterfly's wings as he tried to maintain himself fully awake. The older male chuckled at that, because his boyfriend was just too cute to be real. After a good meal and those attentive touches, it was normal that the little felt like sleeping.

"Good boy." he cooed, making Yuuri flush and twitch a bit. "You should sleep a bit now, sweetie. You've done _so good._ "

~Break~

The soft murmur of the TV made him get out of his sleepy state. Yuuri's mind felt foggy and light, and it still was a bit difficult to think complex things.

Noticing that he was alone in his and Viktor's bed was what got him fully awake. The Japanese male sat up, completely disoriented and with his eyelids feeling quite heavy.

"Vitya?" he asked in a sleepy voice. And he was surprised when his pastel blue pacifier fell from between his lips, a thin trail of drool included.

He was a bit surprised to find himself out of his headspace, with the memories of his little self with Viktor from mere hours ago still dancing on the back of his mind. Yuuri remembered playing in the living room, and Viktor's warm smile while he feed him with adoration written all over his face.

And the reminder of himself eating like that, without control and letting his boyfriend overindulge him, got him blushing due to pure embarrassment.

Before he could fully process it, Yuuri was leaving the bed and padding towards the bathroom annexed to their room. He closed the door after getting inside, and looked at his reflection anxiously.

Yuuri twisted his body, examining the curve of his stomach, heavily pronounced by the shortalls he was currently wearing. Viktor had said he looked super cute in them, but he felt like the garment stuffed him like a morsel.

He studied his reflection for minutes and from every possible angle. He tried to press his tummy, make it look as if it was flat.

His mind just kept reminding him how _much_ he had eaten before. Yuuri cursed himself and his little headspace for letting himself go in such a way.

For moment, his eyes went to the toilet bowl, open and looking terribly inviting. Yuuri couldn't help but think if it would be a good idea to throw up, liberate his body from such amount of calories before they could fatten him even _more._

Yuuri kneeled in front of the toilet seconds after, with his fingers shoved deep into his throat. The muscles convulsed and he felt arcade shake his whole body once the tip of his fingers touched his bell. He felt as if everything travelled up to the base of his throat and then-

Nothing.

He retired the fingers from his mouth, coated in spit and feeling his cheeks wet with tears. Yuuri's eyes were glued to the clean toilet.

He wasn't able to puke, not like years ago, at least.

And it should be _fine_ , because that was an horrible habit he struggled a lot to get over with. Yuuri was aware that Viktor loved him, that he didn't care about how his figure looked, yet his mind had spiraled out of control as soon as he remembered the food.

Two loud hits to the bathroom door were what made him wake up from his reverie, making him freeze right in the spot.

"Baby?" And Viktor's voice sounded very concerned. "Are you feeling unwell? You were supposed to be napping."

Yuuri didn't gave much thought to the fact that Viktor hadn't checked if he felt little, because it would be the normal thing to assume. He was using his 'daddy voice' and that confused Yuuri's mind greatly. The Japanese boy had been having pretty dark thoughts, but Viktor's honey-like voice made him want to slip completely once again.

Well, and if that wasn't enough, the heavy feeling of his diaper under his clothes wasn't helping much to keep him from falling back into his headspace.

That wasn't precisely good, because his half regressed mind felt hugely affected with what had just happened. Tears started to form in the corners of his eyes, and Yuuri felt helpless as whimpers escaped from his mouth.

"Yuuri?!" Viktor was definitely more worried now. "Baby, please! Please, open the door, yeah?"

Yuuri hated the fact that he was the one making Daddy upset.

"Can pu-please wait a bit, Daddy?" he murmured, using the manners he was taught. His voice, Yuuri noticed, sounded small but a bit raspy, very different from the usual sweet tone he had when little. "I uh... I've a problem..."

Those words provoked a silence at the other side of the door. "What kind of problem? Did you have an accident? Is that so?"

"Nuh-uh!" Yuuri whined, and the disgust was quickly replaced by the embarrassment that question made him feel. Daddy asking things like that so out of the blue always got him feeling even littler, which wasn't helping _at all._

He needed to compose himself, Viktor couldn't see him like this. "Nuffin' just go now!" his voice came up ruder than he had intended. "I tells you later..."

Viktor made a slightly annoyed sound, clearly impatient. "Little boy, I'm asking you to open the door and tell me what's wrong. Disobeying can get you a punishment, you know?"

Yuuri huffed, suddenly annoyed by Viktor's way too attentive demeanor. Why couldn't he leave him alone? It was hard to think right now, and even harder to form fully coherent sentences. Daddy was just making things difficult because he was silly.

His tummy made a growling sound once again, as if it was trying to make Yuuri get caught. He honestly wished he could just get rid of it.

"Daddy can go. Pretty please? 'M big." Yuuri tried once again.

"Are you wearing a diaper now, baby?" Viktor asked, voice worryingly calm.

The question made Yuuri look down to his lap, only to notice the bulk of thick padding under his clothes. "Yes Daddy..." he quietly replied.

"Okay, first step." Viktor said, and it was more than clear that he wasn't speaking to Yuuri when he said that. "And who wear diapers? Surely not big boys."

"Daddy but-"

"Little boys listen to what their daddies say, prince." Viktor interrupted him, and his voice didn't let room for any argument. "And I'm asking you to open the door and _let me in._ "

That command made him react, forcing his legs to support the entire weight of his body to a standing position so he could open the bathroom door.

Viktor's face was like the clam before a storm when the little got to see it. The silver haired male observed his surely red face and tear stained cheeks with evident concern. For the way his baby blue eyes widened, Viktor hadn't expected to find Yuuri in the state he was right now.

"Baby, oh Yuuri..." he whispered, and his arms quickly wrapped around him in a tight hug. "Talk to me, sweetie. Is something I said or did?"

Right, since their talk about Yuuri feeling self-conscious, Viktor felt often responsible for the little's sad or anxious episodes. That made Yuuri feel even worse, because his Daddy was amazing and he loved him so much it hurt.

Yuuri shook his head, his face buried in Viktor's neck and grabbing his boyfriend's shirt in little fists. Viktor's big palm was caressing his hair and back, oozing him until his breathing calmed down.

"There, there, much better." The silver haired man whispered, his lips moving against the Japanese boy's skin in a soft caress. "I don't like seeing you cry."

And for his own surprise, Yuuri couldn't stand when he cried, not even if he was in little space. Crying meant showing weakness in such a basic way that reminded him to his childhood days. He had been a completely crybaby back then. Yuuri remembered how each year he promised how he would stop crying, which always ended happening anyways.

"I'm sowwy Daddy," he whimpered, sounding very small and breakable. "I-I did a bad thing..."

"And what did you do, baby?" Viktor asked calmly, as if they were talking about what Disney movie should watch next. "C'mon, you can tell me so I can know what's bothering you so much, my love."

Yuuri sniffled. "Woke up feelin' bad... tried to t-throw up 'cause I felt u-ugly, b-but I didn't do it Daddy! I couldn't!"

Viktor leaned back, so they could at each other's eyes right now. Yuuri gulped, because the taller man looked rather intimidating, and he didn't know exactly why. The Japanese boy couldn't tell if it was because of the lighting that caught his blue eyes just right to make them look scarily cold, or something else. His Daddy looked handsome, a gentle man with perfect looks, but also an intimidating one.

"It's okay, little one." he finally whispered, kissing Yuuri's both trembling eyelids in the softest of manners while his thumbs wiped away his tears. "I'm glad you told me, love. Let's continue this talk in our comfy bad, okay?"

Yuuri nodded, letting himself being dragged to their shared bed, where a mess of blankets and pillows welcomed them. Before the little could register it, Viktor had him tucked in and curled at his side. There, warm and comfortable, Yuuri let himself cry a bit longer until he was exhausted.

When Yuuri's sniffles and sobs died down, the room got reigned by absolute silence that felt weird to the black haired male's ears. However, it didn't last much, since Viktor started to speak a few seconds after.

"I can't even imagine what goes through your mind whenever you get like this." he elaborated. "I think what I adore the most about being your caregiver is the opportunity to see your most vulnerable side, which makes me feel happy and _useful_ in the best of ways."

After those long minutes crying his eyes out, Yuuri couldn't affirm he was still little, but he wasn't big either. The Japanese boy felt his conscience dancing from one headspace to another, and Viktor's words –beautiful as the man who said them– dazed him to the point to make him believe he's still napping.

"It's not like I'm oblivious of what makes you feel insecure." Viktor said. "And all those things that you seem to hate _so much_ about yourself are very precious to me. You... you don't have to look a certain way, or compare your body to the others', okay? I know I can't erase years of self doubt just with pretty words, love, but it seems like you don't get it."

Viktor turned his face, as if he was about to kiss him. Instead, he just breathed in Yuuri's hair as he pressed their bodies even closer.

When he spoke, his voice was muffled. "And I'm glad that you let me get to know you to the point where I can see your most fragile form. I... I don't want to make you feel like you're less than perfect for me just because you're different. Different is fine, and I like different. Everyone is in their own way, you know?"

By the time Viktor finished, Yuuri noticed how his baby blue eyes looked a bit red and puffy, and he wondered if his self hate hurt Viktor this much. The mere thought of it overwhelmed him, because knowing that you had so much power over someone else's feelings was new to Yuuri. It was scary, in a way.

He couldn't help but lean on Viktor's bigger figure and wrap his arms around him and let himself being cuddled. Yuuri felt safe and secure with his boyfriend as the silver haired man whispered sweet nonsense to his ear.

"I-I love you s-so much, Vitya." he hiccupped. "I'm... I'm sorry for letting my thoughts get so out of control, for worrying you, I'm-"

"It's okay, sweetie." Viktor reassured him. "You don't have to worry about me though. You were the only one here who got hurt."

Yuuri nodded, and he tried to return the smile Viktor was giving him; small but sincere.

"I'm sorry, but mainly because things like this can be easily avoided if we talked things over instead of wallowing and drowning myself in my thoughts like I always do." Yuuri rambled, before giving a light peck to Viktor's lips. " It's like... I get trapped in my mind, and that makes me unable to see whatever good things you tell me. I hate it."

Viktor exhaled tiredly, but his face looked fond. His big palm cupped Yuuri's chubby cheek in a way that made it seem like the younger one was a delicate thing.

"It's kind of a two-way street." he explained. "I should adapt and respect your boundaries, even those regarding food. It's just... I worry about you and seeing you cry is kind on top of the list of things I hate to see. We need to have better communication in general, because I don't want this –you hurting yourself this bad– to happen again."

Yuuri looked down, pink flush covering his cheeks in shame at the reminder of his failed attempt to throw up. "Don't worry. What happened today is... something I also don't want to repeat, it was a great mistake."

There wasn't another way to describe it, he thought. Bulimia was a serious mental illness that literally ruined multiple people's lives, including his on an earlier point. Yuuri was an adult now, and he shouldn't let his emotions control him the way it had happened back in the bathroom. He was no longer a teenager who thought that had everything under control, but an adult with a magnificent partner at his side.

"You're staring." Viktor suddenly commented, amused. "What's wrong?"

Yuuri didn't reply, and instead he leaned forward to kiss Viktor on the lips, smile forming in his plump lips at the soft contact.

"Nothing," Yuuri whispered, and he kissed Viktor again. "I was thinking that I love you so much."


End file.
